What do dating couples fight about
Perfect match fantasies will be reliably tested during the second phase of a romantic relationship, which I identify and describe in my book as the “Testing” phase.Pamela Paul, author of the well-researched book , suggests that “a typical marriage follows a certain course.The first year is the hardest, as the saying goes.”* In my role as a marital counselor, I often hear that the first two years of marriage are experienced in one of two extreme ways.That is, some couples experience consistent moments of sublime bonding that lead others to observe that they have “that newlywed glow,” while other couples acknowledge that the first two years were “a rough transition.” I would hypothesize that a major reason for this distinction is that some couples marry too soon, while they are still in the cocaine-rush phase of their relationship.
Some people see fighting as a sign of fundamental incompatibilities. The thing is that we are incompatible on some levels, and it’s delusionary to think otherwise.In the early days of falling for each other everything is always rosy. While still immersed in the getting-to-know you stage people tend to bend their expectations to the absolute limit of their tolerances and are more forgiving of the things that may later bother them.Once a comfort level has been reached and there is some security in the relationship that tolerance level shifts back toward an individual’s real life base line. Once a relationship becomes more established people start showing their true personality.We asked LGBTQ women in same-sex relationships to take our Lesbian Fight Club survey about the role fighting plays in your relationships, and over 3,500 of you answered the call!We’ve already released two hilarious listlings of some of your stupidest fights (The Gayest, Silly Household Things), and we’re ready to get into the rest of the data.
Sometimes you want such different things in the long-term that you’re not even sure if it’ll ever work.